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Tag Archive: Sharknado


Jaws 3-D movie poster 1983

Review by C.J. Bunce

When I was a kid I remember paying $5 at the geek show part of a carnival to see a giant great white shark. We were taken into a long trailer and were able to walk around it, suspended in some kind of clear block. It was sad, horrifying, and shocking that someone would display an animal this way.  After watching Jaws 3-D for our review of Halloween films, I had some of the same feelings return.

You’re not supposed to cheer for the monster in a monster movie like Jaws 3-D.  And yet I found myself hoping the shark would consume all this early 1980s fashion and bad moviemaking.  Every actor earns his or her sea legs in a different way, and here was Dennis Quaid (Enemy Mine, G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra), Bess Armstrong (House of Lies), Lea Thompson (Back to the Future), and Louis Gossett, Jr. (An Officer and a Gentleman) before they all would make names for themselves in much bigger and better films.  There’s even the son of All in the Family’s Jean Stapleton, John Putch, before he would have small roles in several series, including playing Mordock the Benzite in Star Trek: The Next Generation.  Putch plays Sean Brody, brother to Quaid’s Mike Brody, and they are the sons of Chief Brody from the original Jaws.  The Brodys find themselves again pursued by a giant shark, the latest some 35 feet long.

Jaws 3-D scream

Where Friday the 13th III in 3D is an example of over-the-top 3D effects that–absurd or not–you can still appreciate at least for its humor, Jaws 3-D reflects all that is bad about 3D.  The fundamental requirement of any movie, with or without special effects, is a good story.  This story doesn’t know what it wants to be.  At times it could be a poignant look at compassionate marine biologists caring about their animals and their work, with Armstrong and Quaid going about their jobs in a nice summer setting.   In a different genre years later this would be the backdrop for a movie like Summer Rental.  But a movie called Jaws requires chilling suspense.  Jaws 3-D doesn’t earn the title.

Were it merely a vehicle for three-dimensional whiz-bang action, this might have resulted in something like Friday the 13th III.  But the directorial choices are bad.  The images shown in 3D are superfluous to the plot.  The film sulks along and the only action comes about after an hour of the film as passed by.  As to story the movie doesn’t make sense even on paper.  A shark accused of killing people is finally caught, put on display at an aquarium, and then its mother sneaks into the park and torments the staff and guests until it breaks through the aquarium walls to get revenge on the facility manager.  Remember last year’s Syfy B-movie hit Sharknado?  Jaws 3-D is the original Sharknado, but without the necessary tongue-in-cheek humor.

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Sharknado 2 poster

Sharks in New York City?  Sharks in the subway?

The crazy phenomenon from last July that took America by storm, of the shark-filled tornado variety, is back (already?).  Sharknado, the latest of the over-the-top mash-ups that have helped define the lowest common denominator of the Syfy Channel, was so absurd and yet fun for all of us to laugh at, that it “darned near broke the Internet,” jumping to a trending Twitter topic and the stuff of non-stop posts by tweeters and bloggers like Wil Wheaton.

By now almost everyone has seen it who has cable or a streaming service–it’s hard to avoid, and even harder to turn away.  The scene of Ian Ziering of Beverly Hills, 90210 fame, taking his chainsaw into the mouth of a shark diving on him from a tornado is the stuff of legend in the annals of campy TV.  It just brings tears to the eyes.

'Sharknado 2: The Second One' TV on set filming, New York, America - 19 Feb 2014

And in only two weeks we’ll meet Ziering and Tara Reid again in–wait for it–Sharknado 2: The Second One.  How will it fare against the original, or against past Syfy Channel original movies, like Alien Apocalypse, Snowmageddon, Mega Paranha, Sharktopus, Pteradactyl, Jersey Shore Shark Attack, Piranhaconda, Frankenfish, Swamp Shark, Dinocroc, Supergator, Megasnake, or Triassic Attack?

Co-starring Judd Hirsch from Taxi and Independence Day and Mark McGrath from the band Sugar Ray.   Say what?

McGrath and Ziering Sharknado 2

After the break check out a sneak peek of Sharknado 2:

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Sharknado poster

“Sharks–I never saw that coming.”

Sharknado–the Syfy Channel’s latest entry in its ongoing run of monster mash-up disaster movies–just won’t let up.  If you’re on Twitter, you already know how Sharknado was THE hot topic the day of its premiere July 11, 2013, with real-time tweets from celebrities and every other TV watcher throughout the first airing.  Sharknado’s premiere earned 1.4 million viewers.  It’s first encore netted 1.9 million viewers on July 19.  This weekend, yet another re-broadcast resulted in the Syfy Channel breaking previous records for a re-broadcast with 2.1 million viewers.  And the sequel is already in production, with an expected release date next summer.

And this Friday night, Sharknado hits the big screen.  Just when you thought it was safe to go in the water, or, to walk about freely without fear of airborne sharks.  And tornados.

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Nerd HQ car

Nerd HQ continued its panel series today at San Diego’s Petco Park, opposite San Diego Comic-Con International.  borg.com’s own Jason McClain attended the enlightening and fun Doctor Who panel featuring Matt Smith, Jenna-Louise Coleman, and Steven Moffat (and some great questions from fans).  Again today all Nerd HQ panels were available to the rest of the world via live streaming video, which was watched live by more than 2,000 viewers.  Whereas Alan Tudyk hosted the panels yesterday, Nathan Fillion was the emcee for today’s panels, often asking his own excellent questions of the panelists.   (Note that you may want to skip ahead a few minutes on each video to get to the beginning of the panel).

Editor’s Note:  We updated yesterday’s Nerd HQ update today with the panel featuring the hilarious cast of Haven, which had not yet been uploaded when we posted last night.  So if you missed that one, check it out!

First up, don’t miss this great interview with Wil Wheaton, where he explains very well why Comic-Con and its genre fan attendees come together to make such a great event each year.  And he mentions this certain Sharknado cosplayer that Jason McClain caught a photo of today.

Sharknado

Sharknado, Syfy Channel’s latest monster mash-up TV movie is still trending on Twitter and we all agree this lady had her act together to get this costume ready in time for this weekend.  Here is today’s interview with Wil:

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